Friday, December 31, 2010

Banished words

A self-styled defender of the Queen's English, Lake Superior State College annually releases a list of words to be banished from the English language. Here's this year's list.

Unfortunately, checking their archived lists, it looks like most of the terms and words that have been banished have not actually vanished.

We'll have to see if this list goes viral. If the American people appreciate its wow factor, then soon everyone will man up and be googling it and Facebooking it to their BFFs. But if there is no a-ha moment, then it will be an epic fail, and mama grizzlies will refudiate it. I'm just sayin'.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Obama: Either Doing His Best In One of The Most Difficult Times In American History, Or Hitler

Is he a president who is doing his best in one of the most difficult times in American history, or is he Hitler?

Which is it? America isn't sure. But is leaning toward the Hitler thing: Obama is literally Hitler.

"He is either a president who passed a comprehensive health care measure despite staunch opposition from powerful private interests, or a radical-Islamist sympathizer bent on systematically dismantling American democracy and eradicating all human liberty. He either lowered taxes for most Americans while failing to communicate that effectively, or he is pure evil. Whichever."

Snowstorm dangerous for nation's idiots

It snowed in the north in winter, shocking us all and catching everyone off guard.

Snowy Conditions Proving Hazardous For Nation's Idiots

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Salad is murder!

Al Queda is trying to poison salad bars! That would be a really effective tactic if America was a place where people actually eat salad. If they poisoned McDonalds or Dennys, a lot more Americans would be in trouble.

Still, the only safe course of action is to never eat vegetables again.

Monday, December 20, 2010

The Map of Metal

The Map of Metal will help you navigate the leather and denim waters of heavy metal and its many complicated subgenres. Not clear on the difference between Depressive Black Metal and Blackened Crust? What's the difference between Melodic Death and Deathcore? The Map of Metal will solve these important issues for you.

The best part is that the site plays streaming tunes from whatever flavor of the vast metal spectrum that you choose, from Black Sabbath all the way to Judas Priest to Motorhead and back again.

Friday, December 17, 2010

America's Joyous Future

Another great Fox News pie chart

What are 193% of Americans thinking today?

As the above EVIDENCE PROVES, 70% of 193% of Americans Back Palin. Back, Huckabee! Get back Romney, get back to where you once belonged. Literally billions of Americans can't wait to Back Palin. Also, it is 47 degrees everywhere.

What could be fairer or more unbalanced? Mmm, pie!

This all seems completely explicable when you see that science has shown that Fox News viewers are the most uninformed people on earth.

Here are just a few things that Fox News viewers actually believe are true:

Most economists estimate the stimulus caused job losses (12 points more likely)

Most economists have estimated the health care law will worsen the deficit (31 points)

The economy is getting worse (26 points)

Most scientists do not agree that climate change is occurring (30 points)

The stimulus legislation did not include any tax cuts (14 points)

Their own income taxes have gone up (14 points)

The auto bailout only occurred under Obama (13 points)

When TARP came up for a vote most Republicans opposed it (12 points)

And that it is not clear that Obama was born in the United States (31 points)

Guess what, morans, none of that is true. You are wrong about pretty much everything that you yell about on talk radio.

On the other hand, since lots of people like to watch news that tells them what they wish was true instead of what actually is true, foreinger Rupert Murdoch and the Saudi guy who own Fox News just keep get richer and richer from the American morans, and now their taxes will be lower too!

Fox news reports that 120% of scientists agree!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Monday, December 6, 2010

Best photos from the Oklahoma State Fair

Which photo best summarizes the whole state fair experience, especially in Oklahoma?

Is it the Rascal scooter couple?

Is it the ten-year-old ready to swill some Coors lite?

Or one of many others?

Ridiculous bootleg DVD covers

Pop hangover has cover pics from 10 ridiculous bootleg DVD covers.

These are quite helpful and informative covers.

What is this movie about? Simple: PEPE LIKES TACOS.

What do critics say about this film? "You feel yourself trying too hard to make the film work." Sounds terrific! I want to buy many copies of this DVD!