Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Beatles 3000

How will history look at the Beatles 1,000 years from now? They'll probably get some of the details wrong, and conflate some other people and events from around the same point in history.

The video is similar to many PBS science/history documentaries, where scientists make educated guesses to "explain" what probably happened thousands of years ago. I think they even use the smae music as Nova.

Interestingly, 1,000 years from now, people will still be wearing the same exact styles of clothes and haircuts as they do now. And will still be producing the same kinds of TV documentaries.

Glenn Beck's Restoring Horror


Wonkette has some hilarious coverage of Glenn Beck's Jesus Is Taking Over America Festival from this past weekend.

Wonkette even spotted Courtney Love's grandma doing TV interviews there:

Too bad for the Teabaggers that celebrity-for-no-reason Somebody Hilton got busted with cocaine this weekend, completely overshadowing their attempt to install an American theocracy. The kind of people they need to win over care way more about celebrity news than they do about Weepy McDemagogue's attempt to keep rewriting history by co-opting MLK.

At least he and Sarah Paylin got to really rile up their dimwitted supporters and got a nice payday out of it. Remember, the brown people have STOLEN America and to get it back we have to all buy gold from our hero Glenn Beck.

Christopher Hitchens has a really interesting take
on the whole Beck Blubberfest, pointing out the whole pathetic self-pity that's at the heart of the Teabaggers.

A key quote: "In a rather curious and confused way, some white people are starting almost to think like a minority, even like a persecuted one. What does it take to believe that Christianity is an endangered religion in America or that the name of Jesus is insufficiently spoken or appreciated? Who wakes up believing that there is no appreciation for our veterans and our armed forces and that without a noisy speech from Sarah Palin, their sacrifice would be scorned? It's not unfair to say that such grievances are purely and simply imaginary, which in turn leads one to ask what the real ones can be. The clue, surely, is furnished by the remainder of the speeches, which deny racial feeling so monotonously and vehemently as to draw attention."

Monday, August 30, 2010

300 songs: David Lowery's songwriting history

One of the greatest and most unappreciated American rock songwriters of the last 25 years has started a blog to talk about his music. David Lowery of Camper Van Beethoven and Cracker has started writing a little article about every song he's written in his career.

Very interesting if you're a fan, and possibly a good introduction if you don't know his stuff.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Elephants on acid, electrified corpses, insane Soviet scientists

The website Museum of Hoaxes offers the 20 most bizarre scientific experiments of all time-- and despite the website's name, these are real. Giving LSD to elephants, surgically creating a two-headed dog, coercing human subjects to deliver lethal electric shocks, electrified corpses, and much more in this catalog of cruelty and weirdness.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Only 20% of Americans are utter morons!

The Stupidest Things One in Five Americans Believe. Who cares if we're ignorant, we're all probably going to eventually win the lottery!

Friday, August 20, 2010

Horrible music takes on Muslin terrorists

The latest horrible political song to try to cash in on the latest controversy:

Nothing goes with photos of wounded and frightened terror victims better than jaunty mid-tempo contemporary "country" music. The tune's basically stolen from the Georgia Satellites' "Keep Your Hands to Yourself." You hear that Muslins? No huggy, no kissy!

Interesting point from the Wonkette comment section: "There is a Mosque in the Pentagon. It was approved soon after 9/11. I assume by Donald Rumsfeld. Get over it, bitches."

The post-911 mosque at the Pentagon.
There was no controversy when it was put in, because right-wing politicos hadn't yet realized that they could push everyone's buttons by demagogue-ing the hell out of this non-issue. Was Karl Rove on vacation that week? Oh no, that's right, he was too busy trying to find excuses to invade Iraq.

Roger's sticking to it

someecards.com - I wish I could stick to anything as well as Roger Clemens can stick to a lie


Russian photographer Sergey Larenkov specializes in melding images of the past with those of the present, often generating fascinating collisions that produce something beyond the actual reality of the subject.

Fake Science, now more popular than ever

The Fake Science blog presents ridiculously false, bad science that is easy to understand and makes sense in its simplicity. Isn't that what science is all about? Who needs "elites" making everyone feel dumb with their complicated jargon and weird ideas? If freon makes things cool, then drinking it should help YOU keep cool. It makes sense, doesn't it? In your face, elites!

Thursday, August 19, 2010


There is OUTRAGE over the plan to build a new building near the well known nightmarish American disaster Sarah Palin.

Key quote: "Would these library lovers allow me to set up a stall next to the Smithsonian Museum and start selling DVDs of bible cartoons as long as it was in accordance with local regulations?

"Oh they would? I see."

Friday, August 13, 2010

It's the day before Saturday the 14th!

Since it's the only Friday the 13th of the year, check out the Weirdest Friday the 13th Superstitions.

Do you have Paraskevidekatriaphobia? Why does no one live on the 13th floor at 1313 13th street?

If Door Does Not Open, Do Not Enter

Doug Lansky at the Huffington Post has a funny photo collection of the 8 Most Insanely Obvious Signs in the World.
Like this one:

Slogans of Cheap Beers

Mental Floss has some fun quizzes, where the object is more to be entertained, amused and educated, rather than to try to get the perfect score. Here's a good one: Slogans of Cheap Beers.

Some other fun Mental Floss quizzes:
Discontinued Ben & Jerry's Flavor, or Band I Found on Myspace?

Troy McLure Film, or Actual Terrible Movie?

Scooby Doo Episode Plot, or Actual News Story?

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Irate airline quitting guy, the reenactment

In case you just couldn't visualize how that flight attendant famously got angry and quit his job, here is an animated depiction, in Taiwanese.

That should clear things up!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

RIP Senator Ted Stevens.

Senator Ted is Dead. His old guy inability to understand the internet inspired the name of this blog, so here's to you, dead Ted. He's probably in some sort of series of tubes in the sky (or below) now himself.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Jane Austen's Fight Club

The first rule of Jane Austen's Fight Club: one does not mention Fight Club.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Baseball players in short pants?

It's hot out, too hot for long pants.

The Chicago White Sox wore shorts as part of their hideous uniforms a few times in 1976. It seems totally bizarre now, but as this excellent, detailed article about it explains, at the time... it seemed totally bizarre as well.

Read the article and discover who was the only player in major league history to hit a home run while wearing shorts, and the only Hall-of-Famer to ever play a game in shorts.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

Finally, someone has named all those random feelings that didn't have names. The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows is there to help you name that unnamable disappointment, sadness or weirdness that you are feeling.

Like snopes trial: the disappointment upon learning that yet another basic historical image is just an urban legend—- Vikings’ horns, Napoleon’s shortness, Washington’s cherry tree, Columbus’s flat earth—- which raises suspicion that we are being hazed by the dead, who celebrate becoming alumni of life by paddling us with grand sweeps of history.

Or laughtershock: an embarrassing memory from middle school that slips back into your head from out of nowhere.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Crap at my parents house

Is there a lot of weird crap at your parents' house? Then you might empathize with the folks who run the website Crap at my Parents House.

Odd figurines, religious artifacts, dozens and dozens of Raggedy Ann dolls-- these and more can be found in parents' houses.

Famous Literary Drunks and Addicts

Life.com has a photo series of famous literary drunks and addicts. Baudelaire, Dorothy Parker, Hemingway, lots of famed souses make the list.

Alternativereel.com has a similar, shorter list of the Top Ten Drunk American Writers.

A lot of colorful people love alcohol, and can communicate that love effectively, like #10 Raymond Chandler: “Alcohol is like love. The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you take the girl's clothes off.”

Monday, August 2, 2010

Justin Beiber's Swagger Coach

Apparently this teenage girl pop idol is named Justin Beiber for some reason. And she has a paid "swagger coach" to teach her all the important swaggery things a teenage pop idol needs to know. And the "swagger coach" is writing a book, for some reason.

This just seems weird and dumb for some reason. I wish I didn't know the little bit I do know about it.